“…everything is as a broken pencil. pointless”


what i mailed:

mr. boss [name]

yes i’m available on sunday. will see you at your office at nine a.m.


what i meant:

 you blithering idiot.

i spent the better part of the morning sitting on my ass, fielding frantic telephone calls from the client while i waited for you to arrive. when you finally got here, four hours after you were supposed to meet me i might add, you kept me waiting for another freaking 47 minutes listening to your fake accent while you joked on the phone with your college buddy. i alleviated the boredom by drawing eyes and mustaches on every circular letter in the business reorder headlines – something with which you are, no doubt, both familiar and highly adept.

now you expect me to waste another day of my precious time sitting in front of you popping my knuckles until my fingers hurt just so that you can escape a nagging wife and two irritating kids  (i’ve never met them but any kids of yours are probably as irritating as it can possibly get). mr. boy, no matter how anally receptive that he might be, shines out like a beacon of efficency when compared to your limitless lack of concern.

so, no, i’m not coming to see you on sunday. i have to complete the assignment – one you’ve delegated to me yourself, in case that slipped that rotten excuse you have for a mind – sometime this century. so why don’t you spend the day on the phone? i’m sure you’ve got someone very important to call. like the milkman’s wife or the barber’s daughter.

and no, this rage is not related in any way to the other frustrating aspects i have to deal with to do this audit. like the laptop without a lan card, or the fact that there is no way to find conveyance from site area after 9 pm in the night and the fact that you’re too much of a wuss to get the client to provide us with any. or the fact that you’ve accepted a deadline that you yourself cannot meet given the snail-like speed at which you conduct your review – even if i somehow, miraculously manage to deliver it to you on time. and no it has nothing to do with the “person” you’ve appointed to manage the assignment. nothing at all. no i’m simply not coming because if you can’t find a lousy 8 hours to invest in an assignment whose billing will obviously foot the bottomline of your paycheck well then i’m certainly not going to invest my precious time for it.

so, in short, up yours.




6 Responses to ““…everything is as a broken pencil. pointless””

  1. it just occured to me… your posts are always cynical … kabhi kisi ki tareef bhi kar diya karo for a change 🙂 Besides your posts on your lost love.. I ve never read about anything thats “good” in your life..how come?

  2. whats good is personal.

  3. come on! dont be ungrateful! there’s got to be something good you can share with your readers. It would be a nice change

  4. Have you ahem by any chance come across dooce.com? 🙂

  5. i hadn’t. but as i surf over it now, i really like her style…

  6. though this part just sent a shiver down my spine…

    I started this website in February 2001. A year later I was fired from my job for this website because I had written stories that included people in my workplace. My advice to you is BE YE NOT SO STUPID. Never write about work on the internet unless your boss knows and sanctions the fact that YOU ARE WRITING ABOUT WORK ON THE INTERNET. If you are the boss, however, please don’t be a bitch and talk with your hands. And when you order Prada online, please don’t talk about it out loud, you rotten whore

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