“woh to sab theek hai, lekin yeh zeenat kaun hai?”


when i was in high school and the mysteries of the universe still had some interest for me, i once read an article on tachyons. these things, apparently, are the only things in the universe which travel at sppeds faster than light but their existence has not been proven.

you, constant reader, might be surprised to know that i have stumbled on something which travels even faster than that. and moreso i can prove it. i call her zeenat. zeenat is 21, a third year med school student at aga khan, 5’2″ tall, and looks alarmingly like the sexy screen siren of yesteryear after whom she was named.

she was born last week during a conversation on how israel can legitimately be blamed for sponsoring the skin flick business in southern guatemala when i was confused as the stooge who got engaged. never one to let a possible story go by, even if i have to create it, i conjured up a somewhat plausible story about how my parents got together with some family friends and decided it was high time i get engaged. then came the fun part.

with a series of selective casual announcements, the story was spread. just a rumour here and a mention there. socho yaar, abbas ki bhi mangni ho gaee. and the story took root and grew quicker than little jack’s beanstalk. i’m currently getting around a dozen messages a day of either the astonished disbeleiving kind – abbas teri mangni ho gaee!!?? –Β or the smug, i-know-everything variety – abbas. yeh mein kya sun raha hoon? tumhari mangni ho gaee!

if it hadn’t been such a high pressure period, the stud, the turk and i might have photoshopped one of those lousy rose beauty parlour models into a picture to produce documentary proof. but apparently that wasn’t needed. precisely one minute and 49 seconds after mr. lovely got the news from me i received a message from fudge. and this despite the fact that the two are officially totally out of touch even though the air is rife with rumours of certain goings-on. very damn interesting.

“ban gaya raqeeb akhir jo tha raazdan apna”

life continues to be a parodox. no not a paradox. a parody. why the heck am i feeling jealous?


11 Responses to ““woh to sab theek hai, lekin yeh zeenat kaun hai?””

  1. a close cousin of mine and myself once convinced pretty much everyone we knew that we were twins. that was most fun. she and i have had the same social circle and were born only a month apart and have been together since we were kids, so what started out as a gag for my younger sister ended up as something even relatives, school teachers and our closest friends to get fooled with. the best part is when they end up saying, oh yeah, we knew already.

  2. β€œwoh to sab theek hai, lekin yeh zeenat kaun hai?”

  3. lolzz
    bad news travels fast πŸ˜‰

  4. @ abbas: you made that up as a gag for your kid sister??!! he he must’ve been fun. i once invented an older brother who got killed on siachen but the bubble burst when a teacher passed on her condolences to my parents at a pta meeting.

    @ the other two guys: heh heh! πŸ™‚

  5. wats the masla?… go find zeenat πŸ˜‰

  6. if only she were that available

    ***sighs and sits like that famous allama iqbal pic, head on on fist, eyes closed and dreaming about the way things should be***

  7. LOL! Dude, you are seriously fun.

  8. or fun seriously..

  9. either way, thank you πŸ™‚

  10. 10 Mystic

    ufff khudaya! maybe there needs to a post on that eventful show and tell day at the pool parlour πŸ˜›

  1. 1 pretty flowers and pleasant hours and a whole lot more besides « Samandar-e-Bemaina - The Abbasnama

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