deja vu, shmeja vu


for christ’s sake, if they hated the last post so much they could have told me! for what seems to be the umpteenth time over the past four years i was relieved of my cellphone by three gentlemen who will soon, hopefully, be beset by bubonic plague, leprosy, rabies and all sorts of torturous aches and pains. wild dogs will chew their ankles as rats nestle in their armpits. they will spend all eternity tied to flaming rocks while three demons from hell stand in front of them and sing koi nahin hai aisa – waves triplet jaisa over and over again. may they be raped andΒ sodomised by a herd of syphilitic baboons. amen.

in what seems a cruel twist of fate, barely three hours before the incident a friend who works for an insurance company asked me why i hadn’t insured the damn thing.

i am never using a cellphone again.


26 Responses to “deja vu, shmeja vu”

  1. 1 d0ct0r

    thats bad..! i hope you’ve got it blocked and jammed(if that jamming system works at all i.e.) , i had heard that only new phones from Mz can be insured..

  2. awwwww…your last post was about cell phones….ironic..wot shit nonsense jeee. aik tou traffic mein phansoo and then u get deprived of your belongings. this happens only here…..i second on all ur curses..may they indeed rot in hell….and those too who lit the fires…..does this affected the KESC walas in any way? our public has the tendency of exhibitinh mispalced rage and emotions…..thanks to me, my friend got stuck in gulshan and reached home after 2 hrs, while i was resting at home and calling her mom after every 15min profusely aplogizing…..

  3. dude! all my sympathy!!

    can from ur friend, find out if old cellphones can be insured :p

  4. O my! thats bad, yaara kia jaga hey karachi!! bijlee naee, traffic jamms, and then above all u get snatched, ch ch ch, how m i going to survive there—my sympathies are with u, aur kia kahoon

  5. 5 Kenny Mah

    Wow, that’s some fine cursing there.

    And cellphones are a bane on humanity anyway. I pray for the day I can give mine up and live as a hermit in serene solitude… πŸ™‚

  6. *bubonic plague* ??

    arent u quite the knowledge bank! enlighten me!

    waise, ur curse sounds like something out of sharktale, when the old shark condoles the Don, father of franky!
    hahaahha πŸ™‚

    chill boy, do what i do
    get a sasta cellphone
    u really dont need the three trillion functions fancy phones offer, specially since u dont even use more than half! πŸ™‚

  7. 7 skzworldofdreams

    Woah! That’s BAD…and actually really coincidental.Xil, God doesn’t want you to use a cellphone, coz He’s saying, “Bache pehle SK ke saare posts ka sahi jawab do!!” πŸ˜€ And that insurance thingy was such a hint from God. πŸ™‚
    And batster is right. Why buy an expensive phone for the next chor, since they’re gonna grab them all anyway?! πŸ˜›

    On a more serious note: Sorry. 😦 There I made a sad face for you too!

  8. 8 skzworldofdreams

    Kenny: ‘I pray for the day I can give mine up and live as a hermit in serene solitude’. Walk in Xil’s shadow and you’ll lose your phone soon enough! πŸ˜›

  9. 9 skzworldofdreams

    Yaar, Xil, Ek to you are sooooo S.L.O.W. in replying to comments!! Gone out to buy another cell, for another chor. How nice it is to help humanity in very small ways, hai nah? πŸ˜€
    ‘It’s a bird, it’s a plane, IT’S ‘cellman’!’ Out to provide free cell phones to the deprived! πŸ˜› πŸ˜€

  10. @ doc antivirus: i think you’ve heard right. apparently efu is the only one insuring them as far as i know.

    @ tanzilla: believe it or not this happened in one of those traffic jams. your friend was lucky to get home safe and sound.

    @ mansoor and marya: thank you for your sympathies πŸ™‚ and mansoor i’ll try and find out. only, quite understandably, i’ve lost his contact information πŸ™‚

    @ kenny: bane on humanity is right. i totally agree.

    @ batool: ever hear the line “paigham kuch aisa likho ke kalaam bhi ronay ko majboor ho jaye”? thats where i get my curses from. πŸ™‚

    @ bibi: zakhmon per thora aur namak chirak do… πŸ™‚

  11. 11 skzworldofdreams

    Okey. πŸ˜€ So here’s what your cells would ALWAYS be sayin’ to you:
    “Dikhaee diye yun ke bekhud kiya
    Hamein aap se bhi juda kar chale”
    “aaya lucknawi, Chhaya luknawi, choron ke liye cell laya lucknawi”
    πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

  12. β€œpaigham kuch aisa likho ke kalaam bhi ronay ko majboor ho jaye”?, actually,
    and i DO need u to translate this for me

    but im guessing it falls in line with the saying
    “muun tor jawaab”

  13. LOL@ SK’s lakhnavi comment

    umm xille: teehee πŸ˜€ HAHAHAHA … LOL… im SO sorry your phone got snatched… where was it? in the safe ol’ land of karachi? :p

    excuse me, i just died laughing.

  14. 14 skzworldofdreams

    oooh, thought of one more on the way to work…hehehe have my priorities straight…so…
    “Justujoo jiski thi usko to na paya humne
    Is bahane se magar dekh lee dunya humne
    Kab mila tha kahan bichra tha hame yaad nahin
    Cellphone tujhko bas khwab mein dekha humne..”

    πŸ˜› πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

  15. 15 skzworldofdreams

    Enough namak? Ya want more? πŸ˜€ πŸ˜›

  16. @ bibi: christ i asked you – sarcastically i might add – to sprinkle a pinch of salt as it were. this is like napalm!!! enough already!

  17. 17 skzworldofdreams

    I’m what you would call “khule dil ki”. πŸ˜€

  18. typical kazmi overkill πŸ˜›

  19. 19 skzworldofdreams

    Chalo atleast you know who you’re dealing with. πŸ˜› Ab-bas! πŸ˜€

  20. 20 skzworldofdreams

    Ek to your desi wordpress is asking me to slow down with the comments! Yaar! It’s the age of internet and DSL. Hurry it up, dude!! Desi dial up! πŸ˜›

  21. 21 skzworldofdreams

    Tick-tock, tick-tock…YAWN!!

  22. kya hai? jao kahin aur napalm girao. apnay blog per to meray comments spam killer ko khilwadeti hain…

  23. 23 skzworldofdreams

    Wow! That was a very Paki jawab. πŸ™‚ And it’s not my fault your commetns went into the spam folder. Suna nahin hai: “Bacche aur wordpress hamesha insaan ko pehchaan lete hain aur kabhi jhoot nahin bolte.’ πŸ˜› πŸ˜€
    AND I read your comment, Xil Ji, and replied. Now your turn…EVERYWHERE! πŸ˜›

  24. 24 PsycheD

    good to see u back xill-ey! *punjabi ishtyle* keep up the lashings and brilliant curses vocab…need to improve mine further na.

    waakey! u shudnt have exposed those msgs u know! waisey, kaunsa set tha?

  25. why are so many people acting impressed by the curses? isn’t this how everyone curses?

  26. we just prefer ke maa bhen aik ker ke kissa khatam keraim. this kinda creativity is stored for better purposes

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